Personally, I love Sex. It’s fucking fantastic,

But why is sex such a taboo social topic?

Education and Exposure. The way we learn about sex and how we first have it, speak volumes to why we don’t want to talk about it and how we react when we do.

Sexual Education is a spotty situation; I could paint the actual social reality for you: with statistics, that show correlations between sexual education and various social issues. I could, but that’s not the point of this article, think of it as kind of a written conversation.

I’ll assume the following when I speak of sex, that you are reading this. So it means, you have unrestricted Internet access. From this I can assume the political structure and various conditions that you may have been exposed to, in advance please forgive me if you cannot identity with my ideas on sex culture. This doesn’t, in any sense, restrict the validity of any sexual experience but this is a candid conversation and you can’t talk back. i’ll begin by saything that our base level judgement behind having sex is routed in things like trust, confidence, and sexual ideologies. These factors are developed through our lives and are anchored on sexual education and sexual exposure.

Understanding the consequences behind sex, is shaped by a sense of ourself versus various other actors in society. Society itself, being an independent actor as well. By exploring and comparing the facets of these social relationships, I think you can understand why you may hold a particular viewpoint behind sex, as well as how it compares to other social realities. hopefully, we can change the way you think about it.

Our gender plays a big part of this conversation, and that’s a problem. Cisgendered heterosexual men are often treated with a higher social regard around issues with sexuality, and the pecking order falls from there.

It shouldn’t, you most likely aren’t a “cisgendered heterosexual male”, so is your sexual experience, any different?

Probably not, the systemic ideal of how sex is understood has alot to do with social inequality and control. Its because sex, is our most intimate expression of who we are. So, if we are exposed to constant controls on our lives it will reflect in things like our communication, trust and openness in sex and even feed into our proclivities that embodies the experiences of our lives and upbring. Kinda Freudian but from rape culture to femimine disempowerment they can relate to the social structure of equality. Think about it this way: If you live with a different set of tasks than the opposite gender, this may shape the social perception of their sexual expression, which ultimates silos the views and connotation of what should be a free act of human expression, because of the time and society we live in.

but this is the large scale concept to a lot of smaller factors into our perception.

Person. v. Partner. This is the most important aspect of sexual relationships. First off, all sex should be: consensual, legal and conscience. Let’s face it, even if you hold some religious value to sex; it is, in itself, a carnal act. It’s raw emotion and can take numerous forms between two mature people. When the first three conditions are meet, everyone having sex is on an equal level. So there should be, a social understanding around the topic, but I’ll explain how when we move sex away from the people having it, the issue transforms.

Person.v. Close Circles. This can be a number of social circles. Familiesare the most important circles in which we build our sexual identities, over several experience-based aspects of child development. Things like how we’re taught about our bodies, how we experience subjects related to sex, and how much sex is talked about, or how little; all influence our sexual confidence, trust and ideologies.

Friends are an important way of understanding our sexuality in respect to our peers. They come with their unique set of issues. Everyone is different, so our sexual experiences vary and our level of trust should inherently dictate, how much we share. The way sex is perceived in society requires that we trust, whom we share information about our sexual experiences with. This is both a good and bad aspect to sharing. Talking about sex is a great thing: it helps us understand it more; it normalizes some experiences while opening discussions about diverse facets of our sexuality. However, trust becomes an important aspect of sharing our sexual experiences. Because sexual information is personal, it can be thought of by some as social power”, a way of influencing the behaviour of others.

Person.v. Society. Society, ultimately by a dam effect, shapes: the social power attached to sex and sexual information, the formation of sexual values and sexual experiences, how families communicate sexual education and various sexual exposures*.

Some would argue, that sexuality identity and ideals started at the “close circles” stage, particularly in family circles; and that set of ideals are typically reinforced by some sort of religious belief system. This is inherently wrong, because society is the amplification of our micro-social structures*. One could compare the social ideals surrounding sex much like the “nuclear family configuration”. The “cisgendered heterosexual male” taking the dominant sexual perspective and standard, in which to evaluate and compare the validity and normalcy of sexual experiences.

Boy, that’s a lot of people who shouldn’t care nor dictate my sexual experiences chiming in!

…. And if you think that, you’re completely correct! You also grasp the most important concept I’ve set out to explain, sexual ideologies. Much like any belief system, your sexual ideology is a complex self-expression. It should be defined and expressed in a way, that’s both respectful to others and yourself.

Another point to do with sex and society has been called for less sex, a post human society that moves past the carnal for the reasoned. This I strongly disagree with, yet support at the same time. Yes, we should move away from the objectivity of people and segmenting critique of sexual identity but the contempt is bred in the context of our experience and are therefore solved by transforming the experience of life so that sex isn’t a social stigma but a common understanding of the human experience unfetted by harmful ideology and oppression. The only type of sexual relations that we should frown upon is the those that harm the development of others or neglect the freedom of consent.

Sexual exposures*- talked about in mainly the outward social spectrum. Sexual exposures are basically sexual interventions both intended and coincidental, in various situations that can either negatively or positively impact the sexual identity and development of a health adult.

Micro-social structures*- these are the small-scale interactions; they take place between 1 and more people (or person to environment, media, or perspective) and dictate our behaviour in various social situations.

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